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<title>DE Artfest: 5+1 (sort of) by lastrideoftheday</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25316590">DE Artfest: 5+1 (sort of)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lastrideoftheday/pseuds/lastrideoftheday'>lastrideoftheday</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Detroit Evolution - Fandom, Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>DEArtfest, Detroit Evolution</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 06:02:19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,182</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25316590</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lastrideoftheday/pseuds/lastrideoftheday</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Originally for the DE Artfest 5+1 prompt, I wanted to write five times Chris was the dad friend/helped other people out, and one time when he was the one needing the reassurance. But I got total writer's block for the five, so here's just the one.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>DE Artfest: 5+1 (sort of)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Chris wasn’t having a good day.</p><p>He wasn’t the sort of person to let negative feelings get the better of him: he had bad days, everyone did, but he’d usually be able to keep all the negative things in one box and push them aside while he focused on what needed doing. He wasn’t used to this. Just a general feeling of badness curling around his brain, refusing to let any of the good thoughts in.</p><p>His friends would have surely been willing to help him feel better, if he’d talked to them about it. But he hadn’t. It wasn’t even for any reason – it was simply because he himself hadn’t noticed how down he was feeling until he looked up from his computer screen at the end of the day and realised he’d barely done any work.</p><p>It was later than he thought, and a lot of people had gone home. He looked at the computer screen once more. Yeah, he really had spent the whole day staring at it, trying to make himself do something. But his attempts to persuade himself hit against a brick wall that only got stronger every time he tried. He wasn’t used to this. It wasn’t the apathy; it was the fact that any attempt to get himself out of this mood only caused him to sink further in it. It would stop if only he broke through the barrier and forced himself to do something, he told himself, but even when he managed to bring himself to move his hands to the keyboard, he couldn’t keep it up, and he ended up staring at it again.</p><p>Why now? It wasn’t like anything big had happened. He’d had insecurities from the very beginning of his new position: battling through a crowd of protesters to walk into the building where friends of the androids he’d murdered now worked hadn’t been the most confidence-building way to start off his new life as a detective. But it was only now, two months later, that he’d got to this point. The point where he no longer felt he was cut out to be a detective.</p><p>He’d been at this two months. Why was it still so hard? Surely everyone else was under the same stress as him. But they made it look so easy. Nines, Gavin… and Tina, too, had taken on her recent promotion as naturally as if she’d been born to do it.</p><p>Maybe he wasn’t meant for this.</p><p>The thought went round and round his head as he took his jacket from the back of his chair. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw movement, and looked round to see Gavin also getting up from his seat.</p><p>“You off?” said Gavin.</p><p>“Yeah,” he replied.</p><p>“Rough day?”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>Gavin picked up his phone from the table, sliding it into his jacket, and turned to face Chris. “You’ve either found a way to telepathically communicate with that computer by staring at it, or there’s something on your mind. I mean, Nines has got the whole telepathic communication thing nailed, but unless you’ve been replaced by an android while I wasn’t looking, I’m guessing you probably don’t.”</p><p>It was weird, Chris had been so tightly wrapped up in his own thoughts all day that he'd completely forgotten that he was still visible to other people. It hadn't even occurred to him that the effects of his inner negative mood were probably visible outwardly. He sighed. “I’m fine. Just… not sure I’m cut out for this whole detective thing.” He let out an uncertain laugh.</p><p>Gavin raised an eyebrow. Chris had been hoping to shake this off, keep it light-hearted, maybe make some joke and then go home. But Gavin wasn’t laughing along with him. He knew there was more to this.</p><p>“Like, I don’t know.” Chris sighed, trying to gather up all the feelings that had been bugging him all day into coherent sentences. “It’s a lot more… than I’m used to. And I feel like I’m just barely keeping my head above the surface. Everyone’s… flying through this like it’s what they were born to do, and I’m just trudging along at snail pace.” He was doing his best to explain, but he didn’t know if it was making any sense. He looked at Gavin’s expression, trying to gauge if he was understanding what Chris was trying to say. He was met with Gavin staring at him. Chris didn’t know if that meant he was waiting for more explanation, or confused, or just completely lost.</p><p>Then Gavin ran his hand over his face. “Fuck, where’s Tina when you need her? She’d know how to say this.” He looked around, as if he was looking for someone else other than Tina who could take the responsibility. Met with an empty bullpen, he raised an eyebrow as if to say well, here goes nothing. “Chris. You’re a good detective. Whatever voice in your head is telling you that you’re not, it’s talking shit, alright? I know you’re good. Two months in, and you’re already showing the rest of us up. So, don’t listen to it.”</p><p>Chris stared at Gavin. He did his best not to let his face drop into a meme-worthy expression of surprise at such a heartfelt compliment coming from Gavin, of all people. Evidently he must have failed, because Gavin’s face broke into a lopsided grin. “Yeah, I know,” he said. “Not like me, right?”</p><p>“It’s… a little bit out of character, yeah.”</p><p>Gavin laughed. “Yeah, I’m gonna say it’s Nines’s fault.” He must have noticed Chris’s lack of reaction to the joke, because his face turned serious again. “Seriously, Chris. Don’t – “ He hesitated. “Alright, I’ve started now, so I may as well go all the way. You’re looking at everyone else and wondering how they’re doing so well, right? It looks like they’re doing completely fine, because they’re turning out all these results and you don’t know where they’ve come from, because when did they put the effort in? But you don’t see that bit. You just see the end result. We’re all just getting through it, Chris. Expecting ourselves to be perfect, and not realising what we’re already capable of doing is pretty damn good.”</p><p>A year ago, if Gavin had come out with a speech like that, Chris would have checked the news for UFO sightings to see if there was a possibility an alien had dropped out of the sky and assumed Gavin’s appearance without doing their homework on his personality. But an awful lot had changed in a year.</p><p>“Hey, this is a turn up for the books,” Gavin remarked, giving him a wry smile. “Normally you’re the one keeping the rest of us positive.”</p><p>He laughed. “Yeah.”</p><p>“Well -“ Gavin pushed his chair in, straightening his jacket – “that’s my quota up for the day. Seriously, if you want proper reassurance, go ask Tina or something. She’s much better at this than me.”</p><p>“No, it… thanks.” He put as much feeling into the word as he could manage. “I appreciate it.”</p>
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